You can reach a point in your life in which you're no longer excited to hang out with your friends. Years or even months ago, you might have looked for reasons to get together, but you now might be making excuses as to why you can't see your friends. This can put you in a difficult position because you may not want to hurt your friends by breaking away from them, but you may not want to dishonor yourself by continuing to spend time together. Rather than try to decide what to do on your own, consider seeing a psychotherapist. Psychotherapy will help you and your delicate situation in the following ways.
Identifying What Bothers You
It's possible that you know why you don't want to spend time with your friends much these days, but it's also possible that you struggle to know exactly why things feel "off." Your therapist can help you to identify what bothers you. You'll need to paint a picture of your friendship and even provide some history about how long you've been friends and what you often have done together. There are many subtle things that can suggest a friendship has run its course, and identifying what's behind how you feel will allow you to decide how to proceed.
Deciding What You Can Live With
Your therapist won't tell you to break off your friendships or maintain them. He or she will simply allow you to explore your feelings so that you can make the right decision. The therapist may caution you, however, about ending a friendship just because you don't like some minor trait that a friend has recently developed. You wouldn't necessarily want your friends to abandon you because of one thing, and your therapist can help you to develop the patience to endure minor issues that have been bothering you.
Approaching The Topic With Your Friends
If you decide that ending some friendships will serve you best, you may struggle with how to do so. Instead of just ending correspondence, which can seem awkward, you may want to address the topic. Your therapist will help you to determine how to handle this delicate conversation, and will even role play with you as many times as you need to feel comfortable. When the time comes to talk to your friend, you'll feel more confidence in having this discussion because of all your practice in the therapist's office.
For a long time, I wasn't sure if my counseling was really working or not. It felt like no matter what I did, I just couldn't stay on top of my personal frustrations, so I started addressing those concerns with my counselor. I was able to find a counselor who really understood what I was up against, and it was really neat to talk with her about everything that I was having a hard time with. We chatted about everything in my life ranging from the initial issues I started having to my daily struggles at work, and I felt like those early talks were helping a lot. On this blog, find out more about working with counselors and making things right.